When a close friend is going through a divorce, it can be difficult to know what to say and do to support them. Even if the end of the marriage is clearly the best outcome for an unhappy relationship, emotions are probably running high, and it can be difficult to find the right words or gestures of support.
Don’t let trepidation silence you. Ask anyone who’s been through a divorce, and they will tell you that hearing nothing at all was the most hurtful response from their friends. So here are some ways that you can show that you care without saying or doing too much or too little.
Being positive and supportive will make a significant difference in your friend’s life, as even amicable divorces are going to be wrought with periods of grief and anger. Gently remind her that she is now embarking a new chapter in her life, one that’s sure to have wonderful opportunities once she feels well enough to embrace them. If she feels up to it, help her plan a course for a new and fulfilling future. A strong support system is key to helping her get past the divorce and embrace change.
Refrain From Being Judgmental
Avoid pushing your advice on your friend, even if you’ve survived divorce yourself and want her to try the strategies that worked for you. Chances are that she is more comfortable with her own approach. Dancing away your tears and grief with your closest friends may have been what you needed to work through your feelings, but your friend might feel better after coffee and gentle conversation instead. Listen to what she needs, and don’t judge.
Encourage Her to Talk
At some point, even the quietest person is going to reach a point where she cannot stop talking about the divorce. This is going to be a trying period for you and her other close friends, but if you really want to support her, let her rant. Don’t interrupt or cut her off. Before long, she will be ready to talk about other things; namely her future.
Have a Girls’ Night
Make time to get together with your friend and have lunch, go to they gym, go shopping, see a movie, or any other activity that you both enjoy. If you are married or in a relationship, refrain from bringing your significant other along. It might not be easy for your newly single friend to go out with a couple, no matter how fond she is of your spouse or partner, and doing so can be an unwelcome reminder of her changed circumstances.
Divorce can be challenging, which is why it is so important to have support and empathy from close friends. By forming a loving and positive circle around a friend who has experienced or is experiencing divorce, you offer proof that a new life awaits when they’re ready.
At Alexandra Geczi, PLLC, we understand how emotionally difficult divorces can be. That is why we are committed to guiding you through the Texas divorce process with the respect and compassion you deserve. If you or one of your friends is facing a divorce, don’t face it alone — contact us today to schedule a consultation!